Quote from: droqenthe best roleplaying experiences that ive had have been ones where i use the activity of roleplaying to tap into facets of myself, and it does not really feel like creation, it feels more like ... ah, i don't like the word expression, but i guess expression
creation is a side effect because it is taking something that i don't normally get to embody and bringing it to the surface
from the outside, and maybe even from the unexamined inside, it probably looks like creation, but it is more like a 'revealing' than creating and it's nice to perform that act in an environment that feels like it will be accepted and even expanded upon

Quote from: jackThe history didn't reveal itself to you as you played, making it interesting. You weren't searching for its meaning, or for it to give meaning to itself. You already had it.

from yesterday, the monday

notes, thoughts

Quotethere is nothing mystical or scientific
about moon watching

it is simply there,
a great circle of white
beyond reproach.

things created
- began an unnamed godot project, recreating for the third time the idea of a platformer where you can type commands anywhere you like to cast spells. stayed up until like 2am, rapt. very little content, but the pure mechanics & presentation are a joy

being social
- meant to meet with felix, but did not due to rain and sick
- tweeted "a day's events do not particularly happen in order"
- many tbt events, among us
- splatoon at 3-4am
- mom texted me a video of a person speaking chinese even though she knows i dont speak chinese. she asked me about which thumb goes on top of which thumb. right brain left brain thing. such superstition... oh and something about china 'admitting' to GMO...

make a thing every day in the spirit of 31 unmarked games, but not necessarily a game; respect the work you've done; see (the badly named) wholeness of action

when the moon becomes new, stop gathering; start connecting and reflecting

release something on the night of the full moon.

do not make plans.

. . . a rolling stone gathers no moss

- gate's meaning-making -> meaningness' nebulousity

- sylvies sylvieish games ("Scattered Self")
- my comments in 'roleplaying games', esp on self-playing ("to play a role so well you need not make any decisions at all . . .")
- sylvies discord thoughts on improvisation
- (collaboration)

~ backlink first moon's reflection

i believe that this state requires a low degree of thought. encountering 'interestingness' is the opposite of being the transparent, whole, integrated, 🌕 self. . . the complete graph . . .

hmm. what is the complete stance?

roleplaying a facet of the self, requires a relatable role. relating to the world. relating. connecting, being connected.

the emotion of getting in touch with the self, as it pertains to relating to other people... seeing yourself clearly and in a positive light. i guess you could call this life-affirming. maybe self-affirming? i'm not sure

'self-playing game,' not in the sense that the game plays itself but in the sense that the player plays a role, and in this case, the role is the self.

to play a role so well you need not make any interesting decisions at all. to play a role like you play yourself. i return like a refrain to the idea of a game as a series of interesting decisions... today i wonder, why in the world do they have to be interesting? maybe i am thinking about it all wrong? can the mindless obvious automatic decision be an interesting one?

~ backlink: wholeness of action

". . . is all of this really necessary?" he wondered aloud, his voice the clicking of a keyboard. "i have been playing among us a while, and it has no higher meaning. none i can discern. i like space station 13. these games connect people to one another, to themselves . . . "

one person responsible for keeping the action moving, knowing what's to come next. perhaps having exit options.
e.g.
 - the current scene is two characters fighting with each other
 - available follow up scenes:
     - the two characters on an adventure together
     - one character trying to revive the other from death, the other trying to come back from the dead (or not?)
     - the two of them separated, individual scenes

you can use this knowledge of 'available scenes' to help you notice dramatic 'seams'. openings, which would allow you to cut to the next scene appropriately.

secret meta-storytelling motivations
 - players (not their characters) have goals that help them push the story along in the right directions
 - perhaps seeded from character generation; suppose i want my character to die, what if that is a secret 'piece of paper' that is distributed to another player in the scene? if i write "Character will die dramatically", it might generate a few potential prompts... not only to make it happen in a scene, but also to foreshadow it happening? to bring into question whether it will in fact happen? to inquire thematically as to why or whether it will happen? the goal is . . . a feeling of things magically coming to pass, without speaking of them