droqen's forum-shaped notebook

draw a tarot card every day.

DAY 1 - SEPTEMBER 25, MIDNIGHT - THE TOWER

my interpretation is that i am being upheaved. i have always interpreted the tower as a good thing... positive... but at the same time i understand its ill fated reputation. to draw the tower is exciting. i drew the tower in my first ever reading and i felt a rush of emotion, mixed: a strong impact, paired with a strong responsibility...

destruction and rebuilding. the tower represents this intense desire to burn down and begin anew. this desire can swallow me up, if i let it.

rather than draw a subversive tower, i will seek to render an accurate one.

DAY 2 - SEPTEMBER 26, 6:19 PM - THE WORLD

man, are you kidding me right now

QuoteThe World represents an ending to a cycle of life, a pause in life before the next big cycle beginning with the fool. It is an indicator of a major and inexorable change, of tectonic breadth.

yes i know that i am going through a big change btu you don't have to be that obvious about it

i spent hours creating my World card and still while im happy with it i can tell how outsiderish it is; a visual poem but a scrambled one, no appealing composition to speak of.

does it richly suggest a more detailed reading? you bet it does. there is...

gosh, alright, the creation of this World has forced me to understand that i am not so large in the grand scheme of things even in my successes; this is a subtlety about the Major Arcana: they are about things larger than the self.

completion... if i must contemplate what it means for something to be COMPLETE, there are so many incomplete things which surround me. it is not praise heaped upon me: indeed, what has been completed? instead, the world is made up of unfinished things. a storm unresolved. a partially obscured moon. an un-unlocked door. (only in a videogame does a locked door communicate "incompleteness.")

when i imagine myself done, when i am looking back at my accomplishments, there is a temptation to do the same thing again.

RESIST THAT TEMPTATION. the world is wide, life is vast.
the past, this draw says to me, is done,

move on to things that have always been surrounding you but which are not immediately in front.

OK, so, the tarot website I've been using is a bust: it only draws major arcana cards. I'm so mad about that. Now I need to find a new one. Thanks a lot, internet!!! Argh!!!

DAY 3 - SEPTEMBER 27, 8:44 PM - FOUR OF CUPS
i came into this thinking about my own old quote brought to my attention by a gmtk video (https://newforum.droqen.com/index.php?msg=3732) -- i wanted some kind of idea about how to assist myself.
at the same time, while i drew the card, i was thinking about how my deeper desire when i draw a tarot card is to answer the question: what am i forgetting to think about? what am i missing? what am i (perhaps) avoiding thinking about?

(note that my initial draw, which i discarded as i realized it was from an incomplete tarot deck (see previous message), was the wheel of fortune... i wonder if i should have kept that one but i think this was the right call)

anyway, here we have the four of cups. "Your will has dissipated and your mind is distracted from its true goal." the young man sitting beneath the tree is ignoring the cup offered... "feeling nostalgic, daydreaming or fantasising"... "oblivious to the opportunities around you"...

it's an interesting card. my interpretation will not be recorded further.

DAY 4 - SEPTEMBER 28, 7:XXPM - STRENGTH
the snake in snake is a powerful creature... only capable of killing itself... of no fixed size.
i drew STRENGTH with a videogame snake instead of a lion. the snake is a wild and untamed force.
the angel with an infinity symbol for a halo does not so much control the snake as it does guide it...
snake, lion, angel, they are all one.

one interpretation suggests that strength is a very positive card (not to suggest that other representations would say anything other than that), and that problems will be overcome.

i'm not going to worry too much about what this card says, i will take it as a sign of momentum, the momentum of the snake, and my ability, and my corresponding responsibility, to guide that momentum. as well, i will look outward;

who beyond myself is the angel, with kind and wise guidance?

who beyond myself is the snake, with untamed power in need of direction?

though i like the idea of looking at any character in tarot as a facet of my self, i also like that there are two characters in STRENGTH: there, there is a feeling of potential teamwork. two facets or two people or two aspects or two entities, each doing for the other what they cannot for themselves.

strength. it's a good sign, and reminds me of different ways in which i might focus my energies.

DAY 5 - SEPTEMBER 29, MIDNIGHT - KING OF SWORDS
oops, i meant to go to sleep earlier than this. oh well. my king of swords is finished. how to interpret?
"legal matters, law enforcement, military, police and judges"
i'm not too concerned about these, but maybe i should be.
the king of swords may be someone else in my life: i am so rarely a king of swords, i perceive this weakness in myself; i wonder if this is simply showing me that weakness (contrasting against yesterday's STRENGTH), or whether it is revealing the king of swords in others?

last night i spent the time 'editing' down my reading from during polaris into a more manageable format, so that i could tell shelley about it without her losing grasp of my train of thought.

my king of swords. to pair with my ace of swords.

"discipline, integrity, morality"...

the king of swords lies beyond me, that is my wish, but i should play the angel now and then, whisper into the king of swords that i can be. have discipline. take my desire to speak concisely and clearly, and actually put it into practice?

have something to say. put in the work to say it well, say it correctly, say it clearly, say it efficiently.

it's interesting to have arrived here, but i think if i the ace of swords cut through the gordian knot, then i the king of swords cut through the gordian knot that is me: shut up a little and actually say something, with a little help from yesterday's angel.

DAY 6 - SEPTEMBER 30, 5:35 PM - TEN OF WANDS
... i don't have to do it alone.
after an initial success, perhaps many responsibilities build up.
i certainly tried to deal with those alone.
i loved meeting people last weekend who had struggled with similar things.
could we work together to meet the responsibilities of creating great art, again?

that was my big takeaway from polaris. i even wrote it on the cover of my notebook:

Quote"things can be // solved if we // work     on them // TOGETHER // <3"

i am not good at delegation. at giving up control. at letting go. mostly i find it difficult. others who delegate to me also do it in ways that cause me trouble. the package opening incident that occurred today... why did it occur? i was moving too fast, i was too impatient. what if i had just slowed down and let things unfold gradually together?

"things can be solved if we work on them together." what does it mean to work on things together? we must move more slowly, for one. communication slows us down. we slow each other down.

maybe slowing down is okay.

DAY 7 - OCTOBER 1, EARLY - FOUR OF PENTACLES (coins)
holding on (too?) tight to past success.
posted this too long after reading my self,
so the interpretation would not be fresh.
good card.

DAY 8 - OCTOBER 2, 10AM - QUEEN OF PENTACLES (coins)
i wanted to answer a specific question today -- resolve a specific problem, a problem of thinking straight or communicating with another person. to get a queen is confusing. does the queen represent me? the person i am trying to communicate with? ... actually... it's probably the person i'm going to meet today, the total stranger. the court cards often represent people, but i have particularly seen interpretations suggest that they represent new connections.

am i about to meet a queen of pentacles today, and can thinking through this person help me understand my conundrum better?

QuoteThis Minor Arcana card tells you to approach issues in a sensible, practical, no-nonsense manner and you will be successful. She tells you to set goals and work towards them steadily. * (https://www.thetarotguide.com/queen-of-pentacles/)

staring at my own card makes me think of caution, resisting temptation, and a stable future. following a climb, the queen of pentacles is at the peak...

can i communicate my fear about leaving the peak?
what lies ahead?
i am not sure where to go, when here  i am so surrounded by life.

"good business sense." i need to embody this and perhaps will meet someone who helps me out there. i know someone who is practical this way, maybe i need to ask for help. i have been thinking about it anyway.

QuoteWhen it comes to all things career oriented, the Queen of Pentacles tarot card can bring great success. She is a talented businesswoman who is practical, organized and very capable in anything she puts her mind to. In your life, she can appear as a successful person, who may make a great mentor, colleague or business partner. If you do choose to collaborate with her, you'll find that her vast skill set will be invaluable to your career or your professional projects. If she offers advice, listen to it; she cares for you, and will help you accomplish your goals.

I am looking for a person who will help me accomplish my goals. Someone... with a vast skill set... hmm.

I am open to finding this person but I don't think I will find this relationship by being a designer at someone else's indie videogame company, at least not the way I have been doing.

I have happened upon a good answer to my conundrum.

DAY 9 - OCTOBER 3, 6PM - ACE OF PENTACLES

oh no you did not just ace of pentacles that question.
basically just sticking financial stability in my face. fine. fine.
i did the responsible thing, and you are telling me that it was
a good choice because of the responsibleness of the choice.
fine!!!

stable droqen is good sane droqen.
makes-good-choice droqen makes good choices,
and good choices makes droqen makes-good-choice droqen.
fiiiiiiiiine.

DAY 10 - OCTOBER 4, 3PM - THE SUN
radiate.
i'm not sure if this was an answer to my question. i'm not sure how it could be...
how can i make time for everything?

my interpretation is a hopeful, optimistic, "don't worry about it." things will turn out right if i keep on shining.

the problem is this is what i normally do. what's different? i think what's different is i would like to be more mindful of shining/radiating. keep doing it. be a part of something, meet people, don't cower away.

reveal the truth.

DAY 11 - OCTOBER 5 - SIX OF CUPS
how do i balance --- and +++? this one is hard to interpret...
i realized the question is similar to yesterday's. i suppose i have the same things on my mind.
DAY 12 - OCTOBER 6 - SEVEN OF WANDS
what will i get out of {KotQ}? why am i doing it?
... a struggle? this one makes no sense. unless i interpret in a certain way, about games broadly in general.
why am i still making games? then, the answer makes sense. i'm fighting to prove i'm still a game maker, maybe.
DAY 13 - OCTOBER 7, 12:49 NOON - THE EMPEROR
what am i going to end up having done by the end of this month?
perhaps i should interpret this as saying i'm going to become organized. the emperor is also representative of a certain type of energy from someone in my life. maybe their influence or desires will come to fruition too?

DAY 14 - OCTOBER 8, 8 AM - EIGHT OF WANDS
how can i get anything done, how can i focus, how do i choose what to focus on?
jfc the tarot is very explicitly telling me to do what i'm already good at.
just do it fast.

"movement, speed, progress, quick decisions, sudden changes, excitement"

"The image depicted by the Eight of Wands means that the difficulties that were brought by the Seven of Wands are finally over."
you mean the seven of wands that i picked up two days ago? yes that's pretty damn fast, tarot.

i am happy to receive this card, as i am always happy to receive a card that tells me what i already know.
stay the course.

I missed yesterday. It was full of other tarot readings, so, it's all good. We're on day 15 and I did a little reading for something I'm conflicted about.

I need a ten of pentacles - for long term effort and stability to pay off. The choices that are being presented are
the Queen of pentacles - a suit match, a sensible choice, a person good at planning and executing
and Judgement - POWERFUL self-reflection and self-evaluation.

about to experience a moment of breakthrough... swords are the intellect. this checks out. "It is . . the best time to work on your goals - as the aces all give green lights, and are signals of waiting opportunities and new beginnings." "justice and the truth" "your conscience is clear, and your thoughts are swift." moral clarity of purpose, and the mental acuity to cut that gordian knot. i know i'm doing this for the right reasons -- of goodness (https://letterclub.games/2024/10/07/to-do/).

re: HOW SHOULD I SPEND MY ENERGY ON [X]? how much? a lot, a little? tell me
DAY 17 - OCTOBER 12 - 3:40 PM - THE CHARIOT
the chariot sends me big balance vibes; there are obstacles; BALANCE THE MIND AND HEART; success is possible; focus.

focus... i'm not sure i understand, tbh. i suppose i don't yet understand the problem enough for the chariot to represent anything.
i could in theory focus... on making a choice. but that feels far off yet.
focus.
self-discipline. don't get distracted.

edit:: OKAY, I get it. I can spend energy on [X], but remember to connect it to my ambitions and goals. Focus. Use [X] as a focus, not as a distraction. Focus.

HOW DO I STOP?
DAY 18 - OCTOBER 13 - 10:19 AM - KNIGHT OF PENTACLES
argh, this dude again
"The Knight of Pentacles is about the daily tasks and the responsibility that one has to gain through a specific project."
have a project. have daily tasks. have responsibilities. cool cool cool. this is how i stop anything -- by focusing on something else.

". . . reliable, commited to his work. . . . there is a need to be trustworthy and reliable."

how do i make games with flexible human value structures? i am working on a journaling game - that feels right, although it sucks and is scary. i have a job on the horizon. it's a game, but a nice, loose one. hmm.
what's my question...
i've created a kinopio space about videogames' coercive value structures (https://kinopio.club/strategy-vs-feeling-9aOChzb29sXRRTn_ssFfN).
i want clarification on what my goals should therefore be, and especially the role that games play in getting me there.
DAY 19 - OCTOBER 14 - 9:45 AM - TWO OF PENTACLES
... I've seen this card come up before! I know it. My first instinct was to interpret it as saying (unhelpfully) "just balance these two things!" -- what two things? games' coercion against freedom? but... "The 2 of Pentacles suggests that you're working hard to make sure all your bills are paid. You may have to do a juggling act right now . . ."

is that all games are?

with whom do i share my journaling games?
who will get the most out of them? who is the most open?
and how will i know how to find them?
DAY 20 - OCTOBER 15 - 9:45 AM
THE HIGH PRIESTESS (off the bottom of the deck)
= "unconscious, intuition, mystery, spirituality, higher power, inner voice"
SEVEN OF WANDS (off the top, properly shuffled)
= "protectiveness, standing up for yourself, defending yourself, protecting territory"

hmm. yeah. this is what i'm already doing. listen to my intuition.
interpreting the seven of wands is interesting; "defending his position"...

i'd like to keep these games private, for a while. i'm definitely defensive about them: i want to share them only with people who i trust. follow my intuition. i think when i release them i will find myself in a seven-of-wands-like position. on guard against my enemies. i don't want to stand alone against that seemingly overwhelming, outnumbering tidal wave of opposition.

i feel so good at the moment... what do i do with my time? how do i prioritize? i could use this time to plan, or i could use this time to execute - but i don't have a plan right now, so if i were to execute, it would be aimless. when i use the time to plan, i wonder: should i be executing plan-creation, or should i be doing meta-planning? planning for how to draw up a plan?

i feel like going right to the top -- but i worry, am i going too high up? how do i know how high up to go? ty tarot deck for helping me out, here...

DAY 21 - OCTOBER 16 - 11:30 AM
i shuffled and slowly, one by one, three cards fell out all on their own...
i've been meaning to figure out a new 3 card spread but for now i'll use the one i know best
still, a three-part anything seems easy enough.

#1 (BEFORE) - KING OF PENTACLES
this slot is for something pre-existing, to respect as real, perhaps to leave behind, perhaps left behind against my will

"a man of high ambition, materialistic satisfaction, and worldly success."
hmm. if this is the past of my question, it represents how i used to try and plan... perhaps i followed my ambition? i thought of material success.

"With regards to finances, the King of Pentacles is one of the best cards to receive. This may mean that your financial situation is stable as a result of your wise investments and hard work. In case you are taking a gamble, be sure to initiate a calculated action."
i thought of success and thought it was fundamentally calculable. this sort of makes sense. for a long time i thought . . . the way to choose what to do is to be rational about it. (i am not good at this.)

#2 (NOW) - REVERSED THREE OF CUPS
this slot is for the state of affairs now, something present (no pun intended), something actively in progress or in development
this is one of my first reversed/inverted cards that i really got during a reading. it flopped out of the deck and i wasn't sure which way so i kept it. and, here it is, upside down, clear as day.
when it comes to planning, i would say this describes an approach i'm currently trying -- who knows if it's working? maybe i'm not even trying it, and it describes a present bias that i have?

it's clear to me what the three of cups represents but i'll still steal some phrases from the website i mostly use.
"friendship, community, gatherings, celebrations, group events, social events"

but it's reversed. this is very interesting to me. an inversion is not the opposite: it is a complication, a messiness. sometimes it can be useful to draw an extra card to figure out the nature of the complication...

"the Three of Cups reversed can mean that there is a lack of balance and harmony within your social circle. Gossip and scandal can rear their ugly heads. Perhaps there is envy hidden within this circle, and as a result, you are feeling isolated. "

hmm. i might draw a card to figure out what's complicating the idea of social connection because i do feel like my process right now relies on social connections and vibes. maybe the 'future' card will help to illuminate the complication, though. is it working? perhaps the inversion represents how the present strategy is not sustainable? or my personal doubts?

#3 (AFTER) - TEN OF PENTACLES

oh come on.

"The Ten of Pentacles deals with permanence and satisfaction. The card shows that everything you have put your efforts into for a long time will pay off in the future. It suggests that everything will work out well in the end - for you have always kept the long term picture in view, choosing to take no shortcuts."

this is nice to hear. i keep getting this card. but it's not too useful. permanence and no shortcuts and tradition... i think this is suggesting that putting effort in now will pay off, which makes me think about meta planning, the longest term view of all. i keep doing this, and i think it keeps paying off. alright.

let's complicate things. if this is a new card, it is the one i will do art for today.
otherwise, i will make an inverted three of cups.

#2 1/2 (COMPLICATION FOR THREE OF CUPS) - QUEEN OF SWORDS

oh man, oh dude. ok, that's quite clear.

today i make the queen of swords.

DAY 22 - OCTOBER 17 - ??? - THE MOON
shoot, i forgot to hit 'send' on my post . . .
what did i ask yesterday?
i forget now.

today's question, moon-inspired.
i feel like i'm about to choose two (or more) paths at once. i'm going to do it all.
live in a corporate structure and be productive, as well as be emotionally vulnerable and creative.
where am i going to find the energy? where am i going to find the time? how is it all going to go?
DAY 23 - OCTOBER 18 - 9:30 AM - THE HERMIT
wow. fascinating draw.
i think it goes along with the spread i did for my chat with [www] earlier this week -- interviewing for a job, sort of, i drew the high priestess as the heart of the matter, opposed by the king of swords.

here's how i'm taking it: no matter how busy i get, i have to take some time to reflect and be with myself, and i must remember that the work is all a way to connect me to that.

hmm... i've spent some time today doing low-quality tech implementation for tree climbing game...
it seems fine! maybe i'll just ask about [hhh]'s health (eye specifically)
DAY 24 - OCTOBER 19 - 5 PM - SEVEN OF WANDS
hmm. i've already seen this card! i can't draw it! i'll need to ask another question.
but as a result for this question, seems like... grin and bear it? fight?
my usual source doesn't have a 'health' reading category, so if i branch out, i get something close to what i thought of.

Quote. . . fight to overcome an illness or injury. This card can also represent an illness or condition that you will have to work hard to keep under control. It is extremely challenging but you are driven and you can do it.

second reading. i want to know about this far-off event i'll be attending next year...
TWO OF WANDS
i haven't been there in a while, but i sort of accidentally committed to going.
"planning, first steps, making decisions, leaving comfort, taking risks"
yeah, i guess that's how it feels.
"While the beginning might seem tough and difficult, the Two of Wands card encourages you to strive on and push forward."
i'm pushin', deck!!!

-

i drew an extremely beautiful, pastel, bright, hopeful two of wands :) i love it. it makes me feel good about the trip.

leave comfort! take risks! strive on and push forward!

i want to meet the coolest people. i can't even always work with them. do i want to be their friend? i want to meet everyone on earth. help.
DAY 25 - OCT 20 - NOONish
two cards fell out... one first, then one kind of slipped out. we'll go with CONSCIOUS and UNCONSCIOUS for these.

conscious: SEVEN OF PENTACLES
"seems to be taking a break from his hard labor to admire the fruit and blossoms in his garden"
"the end of financial or material hardship. If you have been putting in time and effort in your work, it signifies that your efforts are paying off and they are going to pay off in the future as well."
mmm. sure, i can see this. this feels like it's happening now -- my awareness is blossoming, whatever efforts they might be.

since i have this sneaky unconscious card... well, we'll see. maybe i'll have two cards to draw today? mmmmmmghh. i hope not.
OK, what's left unrevealed?

unconscious: FIVE OF WANDS

ah fuck
conflict, endless unresolved conflict. getting nowhere.
i suppose this says to me: the underlying truth of the matter is that even as things are blossoming in the present, it is an ongoing struggle. meeting people.

there is no end.

toys or tours?
DAY 25 1/2 - extra draws
extra 1 - SEVEN OF WANDS
i've been thinking about this. should i stay where i've been? "hold your ground."
show me this other card that came off the bottom.
extra 2 - THE HIGH PRIESTESS

. . .

i've participated in the toy jam recently, and been exposed to various systemic games; hard games; games about managing randomness; and starting to wonder, what should i do? do i want to make these things after all?

what this is bringing up for me is the idea of sticking to my guns, holding my ground -- though initially i thought, is it saying i should stick with what i have been doing for decades (platformers)? but the high priestess brought me back: listen to my intuition. the idea of standing my ground can be applied just as much to the new perspective, which is being challenged by (toy jam, games i'm being exposed to).

what feels right? it's not videogame toys. these are compulsive... and they make the money... and they are what people like in games... but they don't feel right to me. i need that reminder. to defend and stand up for my intuitive response. not the one that is compelled, but the shining dweller in darkness.

"to do (https://letterclub.games/2024/10/07/to-do/)."

oct 21 - was thinking about whether i was tarot-ing too much, and the nature of asking questions...
a couple cards flopped out and i went with them.
the 6 and queen of wands.
pride about success, and individuality - perhaps selfishness.
i was not sure actually what to read about this. it's a confusing reading, but the question was also poorly formed.

oct 22 - august? six of cups -> he did bring up ssp, and other good experiences from the past. interesting. oh and egw... which somehow convinced him that ssp was one of the games he wanted to check out... amazing

DAY 27 (i wrote day 26 in my paper notebook, you can see it above basically)
OCT 22, NOON-ish
I was ruminating on the name change from Ghost Bike to Wheel World, and shuffling the deck, and whispering to myself, "tools..."
Two cards fell out of the deck.
(conscious) KING OF SWORDS (thank goodness it's one ive already drawn haha, now just give me one new one...)
(unconscious) THE EMPRESS (hell yeah)

ok... my reading... the king of swords is the face of the empress...
god damn it is this just describing what tools are to me??? TAROT. HOW DARE YOU.

on the face, tools are the king of swords: an entity, a physical entity, maybe not a person
but as a character they would agree with "you must establish truth by sticking to the facts".

now... the subconscious empress... "fertility, expression, creativity and nurturing"
a reminder to be connected to these things. be kind to yourself. attract life.

tools have a physical form, but beneath that physical form underlies a deep softness. hmm.

day 28, oct 23, bit past noon, library
six of pentacles
goodness, so many pentacles.
the question i had today was... i have many things to focus on, but especially the Polaris report... laying everything out, what am i missing? what could help me focus?

DAY 29, OCT 24, 11 AM
no specific question today :) feeling good.
my go-to default question:
"what am i avoiding thinking about?"
SEVEN OF SWORDS
gosh, i saw this card the other day, and i've been thinking i need to draw a sword soon. hi, seven of swords!
this card is like, sneakiness, cleverness, the guy is kind of smug/confident about it.

i wonder if i'm not being sneaky enough.

Large design space problem. (see perhaps the essay as realm. sub-realms (https://newforum.droqen.com/index.php?msg=3867))

I am at something like 32-34 cards. (Funny, that's the number of minutes my little frozen pies ask you to bake them in the oven... 32-34. Hm.) I was not sure what problems I would run into, but I am now distinctly encountering, not even halfway through, a fear that I will run out of room for cards which distinguish themselves from another.

It was first the queen of wands who gave me this problem: her colour palette turned out identically to the queen of pentacles'. Since then, I haven't been able to stop thinking about it:

Every card needs its own identity, and there are limited colours.

By the end of this tarot drawing process, will I have exhausted all colour combinations, all compositions, everything? Each card must be its own realm. How many possible realms are there?

i do wonder if there is a general principle to follow... hmm, rules of composition... i could let go of this and just see what happens, i can always fix it later.

the important part is each realm's own realmness.
larger problems of compositional ugliness can be dealt with later.

don't let this problem slow things down. that is key.

day 30, oct 25 - at m's place with j, did some tarot.
for mine, i asked about a new job and how to balance it with everything else
i drew . . . the empress, the moon, TEMPERANCE
the new card was TEMPERANCE
i took this reading to highlight good emotional/intuitive vibes in the past, effortless. not necessarily going away, but this new job might be in a different direction. the moon indicates im currently walking this dark path, between the empress (past) and something else. and temperance, the new card, which i drew, suggests that i should not commit completely fully in any direction, keep balance. i have never thrown myself into a full time job well, i love having many things going on. so i will keep everything going on and not give myself up to it.

DAY 31, OCT 26, 2 PM
asking about an email i sent to mmg.
how's that going to go? what will we
both (?) get out of it? will a door even
open or will it remain closed? i'm not
in a rush...
SIX OF SWORDS
from memory, this is a card all about
transition and change, perhaps slight
grief regarding it. it is foremost, iirc,
about leaving something behind. of
course leaving one thing behind does
mean finding something new. i'll see
what labyrinthos has to say now...

Quotemoving on, departure, leaving behind, distance, accepting lessons

QuoteThe meaning of the Six of Swords is that you are experiencing a transition of some kind, but one that is not happy and filled with regret. This transition will most likely be the result of decisions you made in the past, and now they are forcing you to leave something behind in order to move forward. Despite your sadness, you need to remember that moving on is the ideal option for your future.

oofers

with mmg, i guess a tentative relationship of some sort is disappearing, and i do feel a kind of hurt about it... "forcing you to leave something behind in order to move forward." i'm ready? i've got to remember we have a different relationship, and... well, what does the interpretation say...

"In life, there will be times that the only way to fix a problem is to leave it and move to start anew. You may feel like this is the coward's way out, but escape is the only approach that is left when you have tried all other methods."

oh no... ok, well, i'm honestly willing to let go...

day 32 - oct 27 - 12:30 postnoon
a part of my life with C and MC is ending, i think? how do i say goodbye? what am i losing? will i regret this?
a card came out. why i was i thinking about C and MC anyway? i was thinking this morning while i lay in bed.
SEVEN OF WANDS
oh, jeez. not you again.
am i defending myself? hold my ground, hold my ground. holding it against what?
i need an opposing force.
PAGE OF CUPS ("KNAVE OF CHALICES")
oh okay that'll do it.

my reading of this simple card pair -- note that the opposing card, the page of cups, is always sideways: ambiguous whether it is upright or inverted -- noting also, i drew the cup in this card sideways? what a stunning coincidence??? --

is that i am, or can be, holding my ground -- keeping ahold of what i have gained -- against the perhaps irresponsible, irrepressable, page of cups inside of me. possibly those outside of me, too: there are so many great new thoughts in the world, but for each new fish that appears i must remember to hold on to those i have already caught.

emotional and creative stability. i am feeling it more strongly now, as long as i can continue to satisfy my page of cups.

did a reading for a group activity in which two became three. two of cups was the 'past' card, and world the 'present'... followed by the six of swords... yikes... i wondered if it could mean that we would become two again. anyway, i drew a misty two of cups to indicate a little bit of blindness. perfect union, but what of the rest of the world? i had a little idea this evening (it's tomorrow) to make the single mist into sort of 'two mists merging' to make the mists also part of the two parts becoming a whole. there are two trees, two cups, two cupbearers... why not two mists?

reflecting on an old friend and collaborator... i drew the four of cups which is boredom, and rejecting help... melancholy, feeling disconnected. so i needed another card. i asked, where should i look for help? and that's when i got the new card, the ~*queen of cups*~. who (or what) is my queen of cups?

court cards are people, relationships. and the queen of cups "has an intuition which is very powerful, and is only rivaled by the one of the High Priestess."

"The Queen of Cups acts as a mirror and reflects the depths present in others, so they see themselves in a new light." // i do sort of wish that i'd included mirror imagery. but i like the rain too, and the place of shelter in which the queen sits.

ha ha ok i went and added an entire reflection. it took so long. but it is done.

okay, i'm totally expecting a clear answer from the 'opposing force' card, but let's draw one anyway. what's the thing that's getting in the way of the six of cups, which perhaps leads to the ten of swords? normally i would not continue on & on like this, i would just get to it, but this is helping me to arrive at a 'new card' to draw as well. however, the process is getting more difficult as i do more cards. i'm not even halfway, and here i've drawn four consecutive cards without a single new one to draw...

opposed by THE SUN, wtf? the six of cups and the sun seem so similar: i wonder, what is different about them that indicates opposition? the inverted sun has 'unrealistic expectations' as well as 'conceitedness'. sure, maybe the first one, applying to the past knight of pentacles....

i know how i feel about my course of action now and i was always going to do it anyway, but give me... idk, give me the Staff.

YOU: THE HERMIT (yeah. that's my plan.)
OUTER: NINE OF CUPS (whoa, huh. there's my card to draw... "your wishes will be coming true." that's the wishful thinking? it's a positive card. "Wishes here are meant to come true"... maybe it's the added pressure of the positive outcome spearheaded by I.S.)
i better finish.
HOPES/FEARS: QUEEN OF WANDS (whoa, yeah, this is about the spearheaded event) no wait the q-o-w is not the one i thought. she's the slightly selfish independent person. hmmm. i have a read on this but i won't post it.
FINAL OUTCOME: (please omg) TWO OF PENTACLES (weird. oh, that makes sense. i'm going to need to juggle more work in the future. as a result of this. yeah, that checks out.)

done the art.

i had a question about a person, sort of. a topic, an interaction, a kind of creative relationship. i forget what the question was, but that's alright. it was about an emotional response to its ending. was i running away? am i running away? i got six tarot cards i've already seen, already have a relationship with. so there's no new card here, still. this continues to present problems.

central pivot
10wand VS ix the hermit
a burden opposed by introspection, successful and productive introspection, self-study. oh... the inverted hermit might be "returning to society," that would make sense. obligation vs returning to society....

horizontal axis
2pent -> .. -> 6wand
something that i was juggling happily, an imbalance, became a burden... in the future, i expect or hope for success, for praise, for a satisfied pride, for acknowledgement... perhaps i am carrying the burden, managing the imbalance happily, in hopes of success and praise? i wonder: am i motivated by pride? what shall i make of that?

vertical axis
Q of pent / .. / iv the emperor
this is the most interesting axis to me... i have continued to think about the vertical axis as "my consciously acknowledged idea of what the thing is" vs "my underlying unacknowledged reading of what the thing is." so in this case, i think the problem is a person (a healer, a homemaker? idk, this doesn't click as much, but it being a person does...), but it's more about diligence and rule-following and responsibility. rigidity. this all checks out very much.

i still require a new card. my process up to this point has worked for me, i guess. but starting now i'm going to bury all the cards that i drawn and deal the deck without re-shuffling. if i need to shuffle in order to do a reading then that's okay, i'll start from a full deck again. this is surely the 'wrong' way to use a tarot deck but i think it will be fine.

i'd like to focus on the differentiation between what is real and what is not. there are so many possible paths to take... that's what the seven of cups says, there are images, there are illusions. but what is real? i think what's real is just what gabe said: the kinopio screenshot that i took was the honest representation of the process, of the art. at first i thought the 'illusion' or 'dream' might be the idea that i should post raw stuff and see it succeed. but i don't actually care about it succeeding anyway. the only real path is the kinopio screenshots.

oops, my post got lost/deleted.
that's fine.

day 39. nov 3. 6:30 pm.
i'm low, low, low on energy today.
give me my energy back, please!
what tired me out? what can i do?
TEMPERANCE
ah... downtime. what else
can temperance mean?
moderation.
serenity.
harmony.

harmony?
am i missing harmony somewhere,
with something? opposed by card:
FOUR OF PENTACLES

ahhh. i know you! clinging to what i have, missing what might be out there. alright, so show me the past. and the future:

PAST: NINE OF SWORDS
fear, anxiety, despair, isolation. omg. temperance as follows this...

this is annoying, but i guess i can't draw my future. in case it's another new card. this is all i get!

the nine of swords was very simple, so i did another card. it's no better, but, it's a new one... oof...

FUTURE: THREE OF SWORDS

alright, what is it that i can take away from this reading?


-- the process of making two new cards, and socializing, and generally giving myself in to a process has re-energized me, which is its own kind of answer. harmony and balance and... calm. temperance is not the introspective aloneness of the hermit, but i think it might represent a different kind of peaceful aloneness. being opposed by the four of pentacles suggests to me that this sense of calm doesn't come from holding jealously on to what i have, suggesting i should still... somehow... pursue moments of calm while going outside of my comfort zone. leave my narrow spotlight.

-- the nine of swords in the past suggests that i've dwelt alone in fear of the future. that absolutely works with my reading of this 'open temperance'. and in the future, the three of swords... well... i asked what can i do about having low energy, and i suppose emotional grief, and pain, are not the opposite of being low on energy. Tina Gong writes for labyrinthos, "rejection, betrayal, hurt and discouragement. In moments like these, we are well served by the mind. (https://labyrinthos.co/blogs/tarot-card-meanings-list/three-of-swords-meaning-tarot-card-meanings?srsltid=AfmBOoqUU2bccAcTcT9EO10FkCCjAewd_2YImc6o6e42eWv2l89G_l8n)" . . . remember that the swords are the domain of the mind, the intellect.

-- open myself up calmly to the hurt of the world. sure, that gives me energy. perhaps low energy comes from this fear: fear of pain.

oh damn. day 40. that means we're more than halfway done. when did that happen? wtf? did i miscount? no, i guess not. okay, well, i've been drawing a shit ton of sword cards. i've been forcing them to come out because they weren't coming out the normal way... i'm sorry, tarot, for this grave mistreatment. i forgot about some things i had meant to do today. my energy levels wax and wane. i was going to ask about that, but i already asked about energy levels yesterday and i know what it said, i still remember what it said...

i have a big meeting coming up, i'm going to meet a bunch of people, then we're going to start work in earnest. i hope. ah, maybe i should ask about the gameplay part of the work: other people seem to like gameplay, seem to think of it as important. game-worlds... what do i want? yes, tarot, that's what i'm asking. what do i want?

is the devil how i feel about gameplay, or is it a bad thought that i find myself returning to & dwelling on? feelings of powerlessness and entrapment... i think that gameplay is a (bad) salve for these feelings, that's how i feel about it.

gameplay is the devil.

i've reshuffled the deck as i gave a reading to a friend(?) and now i'm going to draw nothing but repeats. old friends.

the six of cups, my beloved return to childhood.
the star, a healing resurgent waterfall.
the seven of wands, defending one's position.

i drew these cards without anything much in mind. they slid out of the deck as i shuffled. they are good cards. i read this as defending all the energy that comes from this silly childlike attitude, but it's pretty aimless. and i'm forced to push through until i arrive at a 'new' card according to my process. am i pushing too hard?

i know that this is going to wind up drawing me unwarranted swords... i'm not feeling it right now. i'll do it tonight.

i've taken out every card that i recognize, i have myself a "new cards only" deck... this will allow me to draw simpler readings and not get bogged down in familiar faces! but a certain predominance will be very artificially induced. i'm not sure what to do about that!

well, let's ask my question. when caught up in others' emotions, i will try to detach. solve what can be solved. this is a very swords-like attitude, i suppose. what i am not thinking about? what am i forgetting to feel?

KNIGHT OF WANDS

when caught up in others' emotions... remember my knight of wands? or perhaps remember theirs? remind people that they would prefer to be in motion, too. when feeling is a blocker... feel the feeling, of course, but let's get you back in touch with your knight of wands. wave your banner of flame in the air!!! i like this reading, i like this reflection.

i have got a conflict. two different things that i want to do. i think i know how to resolve it this time, maybe. this is a microcosm of problems to come. what will happen in the future when i have more conflicts? at some point i will have to choose one thing over another. help me prepare for this. how do i make these decisions? how do i communicate?

have my ideas and share them. cut. the page of swords is a duelist, i guess. casual.
am i too quick to react, and too quick to share my justifications? i'm not sure how to take this page of swords.
i said, "help me prepare for this," and i wonder how i can take this card as a hint about how i could better prepare.

remember i have lots of thoughts and ideas. open up and admit my page of swords like qualities.
maybe. that could be alright. if i have too many ideas, just choose one. give it a cut, go for it.
cut.

i had really better spend more time intentionally communicating. i'm getting better at calendar usage. a handle on the passage of time and scheduling. i do spent lots of time researching and experimenting -- reading, studying, writing. i wonder what to do with this. i am still making games... i am still thinking about games...

how should i go about doing these things that i love so much beyond games? will i even enjoy myself, or am i so videogame-brained?

maybe i'm planning to talk about this more in videogame spaces. ah, i'm so confused. so let's say i do that. reveal my weird future, tarot.

i had a thought which was assisted by my new page of wands art (https://www.instagram.com/p/DCGUlpLOYSG/?igsh=MTFqbTBsYWxoMTBkMw==):

the image of the tower brings to mind an idea locked up inside a structure. i want to remember... it is about the treasure, not the treasure chest (chests are rad though)

listening to the paint chase episode, frank asked "is it, though?" about the suggestion that a collection of all perfect gems of games would be a dystopia.

i felt that. there is a romanticization of record and book stores... but surely the purpose of art making is not to fill up a record or book store.

REMEMBER WHEN RETURNING TO ANY ART FORM TO THINK ABOUT THE PAGE OF WANDS, WHO GOES ON AN ADVENTURE TO A TALL TOWER -- A TALL TOWER CONTAINING SOMETHING.

what does art contain?

"what does art contain?"

i've been playing Divers and bummed out about it (https://newforum.droqen.com/index.php?topic=764.0), so i drew a card to try and reflect on that. why should playing a game make me so sad, and yet also so invigorated?

DAY 44. NOV 8. 12:19.
FIVE OF CUPS.

i am noticing loss. my emotions are separating me from home, from the past. but is that really how i feel about divers? i guess it is twofold.

i think divers is simply not as well designed as my favourite games in the genre, but even were i to go back to those games, i would feel this gulf  between me and playing games. it's sad. here i stand on the other side of the river...

card art (https://www.instagram.com/p/DCHv7a7JSc7)

i am definitely still dwelling on loss. i'm not sure what to do about feeling so disconnected from, and yet surrounded by, this entire medium. oh, perfect prompt for today's card, lol. let's go.

DAY 45. NOV 9. 11AM.
TEN OF CUPS

i don't know how to take this... i'll come back to it later, maybe figure something out.

"Take a moment and breathe, look around you and be thankful for all your blessings. This card signifies something that so many of us are searching for. . . . the Ten of Cups, which at its core about how true happiness stems from forging authentic bonds and connections with others. This card is most associated with a sense of 'happily ever after' - of family, of lasting harmony and peace."

i am grieving over a loss of games, i am grieving over divers, but i can use the ten of cups to reflect on a larger perspective -- a positive, as well as a different lens on the problem.

i played etrian odyssey alone on the bus every day on the way to school, and back again. i'm going to a new friend's smash bros party at his house... there will be lots of people there. authentic bonds and connections with others. when i played etrian odyssey, it was fundamentally a lonely experience, it was a very useful coping-with-loneliness mechanism.

Quotewas i driven to make games out of loneliness? then what will i do when i am no longer lonely?

~ a tweet of mine, from years ago. (https://x.com/droqen/status/957538417545482241)

i think one of my parents actually saw this tweet and reached out to me about it, haha. that was a funny feeling.

anyway.

here i am, i think, near the end of loneliness. yes, the very end of it. the ten of cups... reframes my disconnection with games as a genuine connection with people. i am thankful for what i've lost, even though i can still be sad about it. how funny.

moreover i can see—maybe—the social aspect better. what can games do to create a ten of cups like social environment? if i lose a personal (and to some degree isolating) relationship to games, that could open me up to different ones. i am not there yet, but i could work my way there.

Day 46, Nov 10, 2pm
On my mind... I'd like to get in motion. Begin action. But I'm lying here, I was intending to take a break today... Sunday, lol. I know, I just know I'm gonna be crazy busy all next week. How do I get myself to actually take a break and rest? What do people do on a break day? What should I do?
EIGHT OF CUPS

QuoteThis is the case especially after being tired of living what was the day to day, and embarking on a journey that will help one have a deeper understanding about life in general.

Getting the upright side of this card shows that you are dissatisfied with your life and need to experience a higher purpose in life.

- Eight of Cups Meaning (https://labyrinthos.co/blogs/tarot-card-meanings-list/eight-of-cups-meaning-tarot-card-meanings?srsltid=AfmBOooDfdu7ETQNaiAkca_Np9D6Um2jK_5GRjMRKQuyWXXgpAAKa0p2)

card art done -- took about an hour. it's very low detail! i spent a long time getting various elements right. so, no regrets.
this art glamourizes the oubliette: descending into a hole to spend time exploring something, something far away from all the cups...
maybe i need to enjoy a little diving into impersonal systems, on sundays. can i let myself do that?

Quoterather than look at this as a response to my question ("i could go find some interesting game to play," my brain shrugs), i found myself noticing, maybe i'm using this as an excuse to escape?

my right knee hurts a little bit but other than that i have all the energy i need. i'm having a good time. the eight of cups is a way for me to look at the impulse to take a break when i don't need one as an impulse to escape, to abandon. "searching for truth" is just the justification that one might use.

-my instagram post (https://www.instagram.com/p/DCNGJbMJoFe/)

DAY 47 - NOV 11 - 11 PM

seeking understanding. respect for creative process / results.
wanting to help others? to do something, to do something...
(i haven't sought earth-shattering change for a while have i?)
EXAT represents the entire field! i love that

q - my EXAT journey is sort of on hold... i'd like to focus more on it? but maybe i can't do it right now? i'm going to let it sit idle, a slow process. is there anything i'm forgetting to think about, or avoiding thinking about?

V THE HIEROPHANT

... i learned today that psychology and therapy are relatively new fields. but, something a hundred years old might be tradition enough for me to feel comforted by its hierophant-like stability. this card describes one of the motivations behind EXAT for me -- and part of it is education. this is one of those dead-obvious cards that tells me what i already know.

i don't mind. i like that stuff in readings. :)

day 48 nov 12 - 10:50 am
do i need more sleep?? how will i know if im pushing my body too hard??
life just feels so good and full right now.
can i really simply enjoy being extremely busy, and just letting things fall on me and on the horizon?
three of cups HELL YEA

my friends will tell me.

day 50, the fool. i did have a question, but is it not to be recorded here

day 51, nov 15, 8:30 pm. who am i?

X THE WHEEL

art worlds. tell me something i don't know.
day 52. nov 16, past midnight.
art worlds. digital art, virtual spaces. real spaces, real people.
a bit of pixel art in a blank room.
shadows, nonidentical reproductions, artists.
tell me something i don't know.

mmmmmhhhhhhh. ok. okay, art worlds. i have a mountain to go be buried under alone.

ok, please, please just be good for me, deck. i am looking for a new card.
i'm feeling excited and good right now, am i going to feel bad later about this design stuff?
make stuff for freaks & myself, and trust in the team to chill it the fuck out as necessary.
the deck flipped out the moon and then eight of swords...
are these right?

(day 53, nov 17, 7:30 pm, b t w)

walking, carefully, between two worlds.
and the eight of swords says that i feel trapped, but that feeling trapped is all in my own mind.
i get it. i hope w's words are the key to set myself free. i am ready to be free! untrap myself.
stop straddling the two worlds and go straight into savagery

update: moon is not only about walking between two words... it is also about letting intuition light the path. walk through darkness in moonlight... anyway i'm not going to re-interpret yesterday's thoughts. it's another day!

DAY 54. NOV 18. A LITTLE BEFORE 1PM.

okay so what am i asking about. i'm busy! i'm busy and i like it! i am getting better at forming mental checklists and what not. i'm holding things in my mind and doing them later. it rules, actually. caffeine helps. anyway.

what am i forgetting to think about? what does my scheme miss? what could i be paying more attention to, what would i get out of that?

. . . i'm planning to draw through cards until i get a new one, wish me luck. please show me a stranger, tarot deck! <3

NINE OF WANDS

"EXHAUSTION."

bubbling, boiling, churning...
the seven of wands popped out of the deck twice... weird. maybe it's something physically off about the card that makes it come out so damned much but either way it put me in the mood to ask, stand my ground in what way? work came to mind first. work, work, work. i presented some problems i was having conceptually, was asked to carry on. i guess i still have the same problems? (am i making a game design or just selling an abstract fantasy?) stand my ground. i'm right, and i'll continue to be right. but i'll also do the work! that's fine, i guess.

how do i design a game that seems to contain a fundamental conflict?

so the next card i drew was the inverted ace of swords.

Quoteconfusion, miscommunication, hostility, arguments, destruction, brutality

i think it's time to clean up the deck. sort it all out. weed out the drawn so i can draw an undrawn only.

can i simply carry on like this, or do i insist that things don't make sense?
no, that's not right. i'm going to state my mind.
the seven of wands demands it--and also i know it's what i'm going to do, lol.
the inverted ace of swords suggests a possible future. give me a card to advise me:
what should i do, or what should i expect?

the nine of swords is a guilty conscience, the swords are falling, i know that, i know that. i have already done the nine of swords! it slipped in here. wake up from this nightmare!!! okay, so i want to get over the guilty conscience. i have a feeling that something will die (again).

tell me what i want, or how to get what i want, or whether i can even get what i want. i want something, tell me how i'm going to go about pursuing it. tell me if i'm going to get it.

DEATH

i don't have a well-formed question... something about feeling loose, free, untethered... it's a good feeling! i've done some work and something has been put out into the world. i'll feel this way about the tarot deck someday.

i'm thinking about writing a poetry-like or story-like guidebook for my tarot deck. hmm. how can i think about this? where am i going? should i start now? is there another way to do it? what am i not recognizing?

-

KNIGHT OF WANDS, ACE OF WANDS, QUEEN OF CUPS

-

nooo fucking way.

i drew the ace of wands from my deck of remaining cards and thought, eh, i'm not feelin it... i didn't have a well-formed question and idk i just don't want to do this one today, for whatever reason. i very rarely do this.

then i shuffledi t up -- i shuffled it way the hell up -- and drew a face-down remaining card, and two done cards, and shuffled them together to get a past-present-future three-card reading and what the hell, it gave me my ace of wands back... so i guess it's fate or whatever. god

well fuck yeah

- i want to do things, to remain ever in motion, especially in a showy, visible, noticed way

- the ace of wands strikes: a bolt of inspiration. i cannot, do not, do not want to, resist.

- in this case, and in my ideal case, this creation strikes an emotional chord. "The Queen of Cups acts as a mirror (https://labyrinthos.co/blogs/tarot-card-meanings-list/queen-of-cups-meaning-tarot-card-meanings)."

so this is the tarot's response to my doing more involved interpretations in a novel format, something that's been on my mind. OK. i just gotta remember that the underlying issue, the prerequisite, the motivating foundational force, is my knight of wands. daily habits.

peace after a battle. the four follows the three, and we are here in the aftermath, in a moment of reprieve. that is where i am right now. maybe i'm not ready to know where i'm going because i'm dwelling too much on my wounds.

DAY 58. NOV 22. 3 PM.

beginning to recognize it's myself--i dislike games... that's okay. that's fine. i have a negative reponse within myself. i have a position, a moral opinion, a flavour preference. so what next?

FIVE OF SWORDS

gosh so many swords comin' out! i guess this was bound to happen, i'm forcing out every last card...

QuoteDespite the fact that you think you've won, you might still lose in the big picture
. . .
What is more important to you? Mutual progress, or winning?

-Five of Swords Meaning (https://labyrinthos.co/blogs/tarot-card-meanings-list/five-of-swords-meaning-tarot-card-meanings)

argh. so i've described a situation where i feel at peace with my status. i don't think of it as a fight, but i am definitely in a post-conflict position. i was conflicted, and now i think it's just a personal thing. except... every time i talk about this with a game dev i think we have interesting conversations. so i am taking this as a timely reminder not to isolate myself. after yesterday's four of swords -- a bloody battle -- i have found some peace. but is it peace, or is it a selfish victory?

i do care about mutual progress so much more than i care about winning.

DAY 59. NOV 23. 9:30 AM.

i couldn't respond to my friend... am i even interested in their problems at all?
what should i be listening to? how will i know?

KING OF WANDS

the king of wands... a leader, big picture, vision, optimisim/// i suppose there is something here, a glimmer. optimism. boldness. i'm not sure how to dwell. if there is a problem, then what? solve it, or work around it? if there is a bad feeling, can i do something with it? i think about the future, i think about how to 'lead'. if there is no future, no leading, then it is ok to let the topic wither and dry out. it is ok, right?

day 61. nov 26 (skipped a day). 9 AM.
yesterday was quite a day! what am i going to do with today?
i might be making a website for kat. just tell me something about how it's going to go! what to expect!
= two of swords (of course. another sword. are we going to have any minor arcana left?)

the two of swords - difficult decisions. stalemate. and hidden information. at the moment i've been thinking about the website project as something that is either going to be easy or hard. that is, in simple terms: of work to be done. but this card has allowed me to reflect on the possibility of creative conflict, and of unknown problems down the line... the 'difficult decision' is not whether i do it or not. that will be easy. the hard part is going to come later (if we do work together on the website). remember that.

huh. well, it's a good omen... maybe it's telling me that the way forward involves a bit of isolation in a high tower. i'm being very social and it's possible that this socializing is not for the best.

five cards left. but i don't have any questions! i feel pretty good.

two cards left. after this, one card will remain. i feel good. i feel great! it's exciting. and, my god, this kill gameplay thing is going nuts. or it feels like it is, anyway. i just keep having thoughts, and thoughts, and thoughts. and they're organized. they make sense to me. what is happening? who am i?

----
mini devlog.
i started developing a small app for drawing my tarot cards.
i wrote a handful of card 'interpretations' or meanings or whatever ('statements'?), and they were much too long in the app. see them here (https://newforum.droqen.com/index.php?board=44.0)
then i started writing shorter ones in separate files for better viewing at phone-scale, but creating a new file for every description was a lot of friction. i didn't realize that until i began looking at them in retrospect.
i've finally figured out a new kind of card prompt that works better for the phone format... i think it's going to be great. really great.
something key is that i'm going to be writing all the cards in one continuous file; this -- along with the new prompt format -- will make the act of writing "78 short card descriptions" much more manageable, more like writing one flowing piece of text. whether this will translate into individually good card descriptions remains to be seen :)
----